1. Emma Thompson kept it real at the Golden Globes.

Paul Drinkwater / Reuters

2. Rihanna tried to relax at the beach.

Charles Pitt / Splash News / Via buzzfeed.com

3. Jon Hamm filmed Mad Men.


4. Kanye West wore a hoodie with a fur coat.


5. Tom Hanks scootered around town.


6. Michael Fassbender and Benedict Cumberbatch posed like this.

Todd Williamson/Invision for FOX Broadcasting Company / AP Images / Via buzzfeed.com

7. Jason Schwartzman picked up some green juice.


8. Miley Cyrus got a bowlcut.


9. The Entourage guys filmed on a yacht.


10. Gisele drove around Costa Rica like so.

11. Thor helped to announce the Oscar nominations.

Phil Mccarten / Reuters

12. Jay Z waved.


13. Fergie cuddled her baby Axl.


14. Taylor Swift danced.

Jonathan Leibson / Getty Images / Via buzzfeed.com

15. Nick Kroll had froyo.


16. Will Smith looked surprised.


17. and Tina Fey and Amy Poehler killed it as hosts of the Golden Globes again.

Paul Drinkwater / Reuters

Read more: http://buzzfeed.com/whitneyjefferson/things-celebrities-did-this-week-01-17

1. Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” was originally written for Celine Dion.
2. The song “Torn” by Natalie Imbruglia is actually a cover. The original is by Ednaswap.
3. “Tainted Love” is a cover as well. The original is by Gloria Jones and came out in 1964.
4. ALSO “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” is a cover by some dude. The original is by a guy named Robert Hazard.
5. One last one: “I Love Rock & Roll” is a cover. It was originally by The Arrows, not Joan Jett.
6. The song “Sweet Child of Mine” was written in five minutes.

7. The song “Like a Virgin” is actually about a guy getting over a breakup.
8. Little Richard’s “Tutti Frutti” is actually about anal sex.
9. The song “Summer of 69” by Bryan Adams is about 69’ing, like, sexually. In this interview, he said: “Some parts [of the song] are autobiographical, but the title comes from the idea of 69 as a metaphor for sex. Most people thought it was about the year 1969.”
10. Serial killer Aileen Wuornos was obsessed with Natalie Merchant’s “Carnival.” She requested they play it at her funeral.

11. Billy Joel’s “Only the Good Die Young” is about a man trying to convince a Catholic girl to lose her virginity to him.
12. Sarah McLachlan’s song “Angel” is about heroin addiction.
13. The song “Closing Time” by Semisonic is not about closing a bar, it’s about the birth of the lead singer’s daughter.
14. “Zombie” by The Cranberries is about terrorism in Northern Ireland.
15. “Slide” by The Goo Goo Dolls is about abortion.

16. “Brick” by Ben Folds Five is also about abortion.
17. And “The Freshman” by The Verve Pipe is about abortion as well.
18. Shel Silverstein wrote “A Boy Named Sue.”
19. “Gettin’ Jiggy wit It” was written by Nas.
20. The song “Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites” samples this YouTube video of a girl stacking cups. “OH MY GOSH.”

21. Justin Timberlake’s “Rock Your Body” was written by Pharrell for Michael Jackson’s final album, Invincible.
22. “…Baby One More Time” was rejected by TLC.
23. Rihanna’s “Umbrella” was supposed to be a Britney Spears song.
24. Leona Lewis was originally supposed to sing Rihanna’s “We Found Love.”
25. “Toxic” was intended for Kylie Minogue, not Britney Spears.
26. Britney Spears’ “I’m a Slave 4 U” was written for Janet Jackson.
27. “Semi-Charmed Life” is about a couple on a crystal meth binge.

28. “1985” by Bowling for Soup is originally by the band SR-71.
29. “Red Red Wine” by UB40 was originally recorded by Neil Diamond
30. Prince wrote Sinead O’Connor’s “Nothing Compares 2 U.”

31. “The Way” by Fastball is about an elderly couple who went missing and were later found dead in a ravine.
32. Bruce Springsteen wrote “Blinded by the Light.”
33. “Since U Been Gone” was turned down by Pink and Hilary Duff before Kelly Clarkson recorded it.
34. Bruno Mars wrote CeeLo Green’s “Fuck You.”
35. “Me and Mr. Jones” by Amy Winehouse is about Nas.

36. Avril Lavigne helped write the Kelly Clarkson song “Breakaway.” It was meant to go on Avril’s first album, the one with “Sk8er Boi” and “Complicated,” but it didn’t really fit with her image.
37. “How Will I Know” by Whitney Houston was originally supposed to be for Janet Jackson.
38. Kylie Minogue’s “Can’t Get You Out of My Head” was written for S Club 7.
39. Jesse McCartney wrote Leona Lewis’ “Bleeding Love.”
40. Frank Ocean wrote the Justin Bieber song “Bigger.”

41. Aretha Franklin’s “Respect” was written by Otis Redding. You can listen to his version here.
42. “You Oughta Know” by Alanis Morissette is about Dave Coulier (from Full House).
43. “Ben” by Michael Jackson was originally intended for Donny Osmond.
44. Eve 6’s “Here’s to the Night” is about a one-night stand.
45. Miley Cyrus’ “We Can’t Stop” was originally intended for Rihanna.
46. “Bad” was originally supposed to be a duet between Michael Jackson and Prince.

47. The song “Hey Ya” by Outkast is actually about a man stuck in a loveless relationship.
48. The DMB song “Crash” is sung from the perspective of a peeping tom.
49. “Disturbia” by Rihanna was originally a Chris Brown song.
50. Billy Joel’s “Uptown Girl” MAY actually be about his then-fling, Elle Macpherson.
51. Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes” is about his then-girlfriend, Rosanna Arquette.
52. Lori Lieberman wrote “Killing Me Softly,” not Roberta Flack.
53. Shania Twain or Faith Hill were both given the opportunity to record Beyoncé’s “Irreplaceable.”

54. “Candle in the Wind” was originally written about Marilyn Monroe but rewritten about Princess Diana when she was killed and titled “Goodbye England’s Rose.”
55. Bob Marley’s “I Shot The Sheriff” is about birth control. Bob Marley didn’t want his girlfriend to take birth control pills. The doctor who prescribed the pills was the sheriff.
56. The song “There She Goes” by Sixpence None the Richer is about heroin. The song was actually originally by The La’s too.
57. LFO’s “Girl on TV” is about Jennifer Love Hewitt.
58. Usher’s “Burn” is about Chilli from TLC.
59. The song “Hollaback Girl” by Gwen Stefani was written in response to something Courtney Love said about Gwen in Seventeen magazine.
60. Madonna’s “Take a Bow” is reportedly about Sean Penn.

61. “Hero” by Mariah Carey was originally intended for Gloria Estefan.
62. Lady Gaga’s “Telephone” was originally written for Britney Spears. You can listen to Britney’s demo here.
63. Prince wrote The Bangles’ “Manic Monday.”
64. The song “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds” is not about an LSD trip. It’s about a painting John Lennon’s son drew for him.
65. Prince’s song “1999” is about nuclear war.

Note: Some of these have been corrected and changed thanks in part to readers like you.

Read more: http://buzzfeed.com/mjs538/songs-youll-never-be-able-to-listen-to-the-same-way-again


The movie within the movie.
By Kilian Eng.


By Rich Kelly.


By Laurent Durieux.


By Jay Ryan.
Wes Anderson’s best film, IMHO.


Very cool.
By Jock.

See all of the posters @ Mondo.
Via: Dangerous Minds.

Read more: http://buzzfeed.com/copyranter/austin-art-gallerys-cool-oscar-movie-posters

Crazy Soccer Player Plays With Wild Lions

South African zookeeper Kevin Richardson has been working with wild lions for nearly his entire life. He feeds them, hugs them, and even sleeps with them. But he has taken things to the next level in this new viral video commissioned by fashion company Van Gils. To bring attention to the destruction of lion habitats in Africa, Kevin plays soccer, aka football, with a pride of wild lions. Of course, they cheat a little by using all fours, but that’s understandable.


Read more: http://www.viralviralvideos.com/2014/05/19/crazy-soccer-player-plays-with-wild-lions/

While flipping through the pages of your favorite book or maybe listening to the chorus of a favorite song, you might begin to wonder what was going through the mind of that artist. That’s almost impossible to know for sure, but we are able to know the next best thing: what the rooms of these creative geniuses looked like when they worked on their legendary projects. Check it out!

John Lennon and Yoko Ono, musician and artists.

Jane Austen, writer.

Mark Twain, writer.

Virginia Woolf, writer.

Al Gore, former United States vice president.

Susan Sontag, writer and filmmaker.

Charlotte Brontë, writer.

Tina Fey, writer and actress.

Anne Sexton, poet.

George Bernard Shaw, playwright.

Pablo Picasso, artist.

Rudyard Kipling, writer.

Roald Dahl, children’s author.

Albert Einstein, theoretical physicist.

Georgia O’Keefe, painter.

Yves Sain Laurent, fashion designer.

Adrian Tomine, graphic novelist.

Jackson Pollock, painter.

John Updike, writer.

Nigella Lawson, food writer.

Francis Bacon, painter.

E.B. White, writer.

Alexander Calder, sculpter.

Chip Kidd, book cover designer.

David Hockney, painter.

Joan Miró, artist.

Colm Tóibín, writer.

Marc Chagall, painter.

Woody Allen, filmmaker.

Lisa Congdon, illustrator.

Marc Johns, illustrator.

Amanda Hesser, food writer.

Ray Eames, designer and artist.

Mark Rothko, painter.

William Buckley, writer and commentator.

Martin Amis, writer.

Milton Glaser, graphic designer.

Nikki McClure, illustrator.

Paul Cézanne, painter.

Yoshitomo Nara, artist.

Orla Keily, fashion designer.

Susan Orlean, journalist.

Willem de Kooning, artist.

Ruth Reichl, food writer.

Will Self, writer.

(via: BuzzFeed and Flavorwire.) This makes me feel a whole lot better about my messy room. Share with your friends by clicking the link below!

Read more: http://viralnova.com/famous-workspaces/

So apparently someone believes that a doodle and autograph from Andrew Luck is worth $1,500. Of course Andrew Luck hasn’t taken a single pro snap that counted. And the track record for QBs picked first overall isn’t stellar (how would you like a Tim Couch doodle of Cleveland Browns Stadium?). But according to ESPN’s Darren Rovell someone chose to ignore all that and shell out a bunch of money on eBay for what may in a few years be an expensive piece of toilet paper.

I mean what’s the best case scenario here? Let’s say for a second Andrew Luck is the next Tom Brady.

Would you even pay $1500 for this if Tom Brady drew it?

A look at the man the NBA has banned for life and what’s next for him and his team.

NBA Commissioner Adam Silver

Chris Pedota/The Record / MCT

Los Angeles Clippers Owner Donald Sterling

Kirby Lee / Reuters


Just three months into his tenure as NBA commissioner, Adam Silver brought the full weight of his office down on Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling, banning him from the league for life and fining him the maximum penalty, $2.5 million.

Next, Silver will move to have Sterling excommunicated from the NBA completely by forcing the sale of his team. To achieve this, Silver will need at least three-quarters of league’s owners to agree on a nuanced interpretation of the NBA bylaws and vote Sterling out.

Silver said he has the necessary support to do so, but the lawsuit that could follow that vote would prove to be quite messy.

A date for the owners’ vote is yet to be determined, but while we wait, here’s everything we know about Donald Sterling, the man the NBA banned for life, and how the league will try to get rid of him.

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Lucy Nicholson / Reuters

1. Who is Donald Sterling?

Donald Sterling was born Donald Tokowitz sometime around 1933. His actual age is a mystery (he’s believed to be 80 or 81). The only son of an immigrant produce peddler in Chicago, Sterling moved to the Boyle Heights section of Los Angeles, then a poor area of the city, at age 2.

After graduating Roosevelt High School, Sterling attended college at Cal State Los Angeles and Southwestern University School of Law, graduating from the latter cum laude in 1961, at age 23. To pay his way through law school, Sterling worked as a salesman at a furniture store. While selling furniture he changed his name from Tokowitz to Sterling. (In 1999, he told LA Magazine he changed his name because Sterling “sounded like success.”) In 1955, Sterling married the boss’s daughter, Rochelle.

Sterling and Shelly had three children together: Scott, Chris, and Joanna. In 2013, Scott Sterling died of an apparent drug overdose in a Malibu, Calif., apartment.

According to multiple media reports, Donald and Shelly Sterling are separated but not divorced.

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Jose Carlos Fajardo/Bay Area News Group / MCT

Rochelle Sterling (center), wife of Donald Sterling.

2. How did Sterling make his money?

After law school, Sterling opened his own small firm and mostly represented clients from his Boyle Heights neighborhood. By age 27, Sterling was representing more prominent Beverly Hills clients, and eventually he started to get into the real estate game.

Much of Sterling’s wealth comes from real estate. In 2000, Sports Illustrated reported he owned the Malibu Yacht Club, the Beverly Comstock Hotel, and scores of apartments in Beverly Hills.

Sterling developed a reputation for buying properties in disrepair, fixing them, and upping the rents. In 1986, some of his Beverly Hills tenants marched on City Hall to protest the rent increases in Sterling’s buildings.

3. How did he become an NBA owner?

In 1979, Sterling bought 11 Santa Monica apartments from another Los Angeles real estate magnate, Jerry Buss. Buss used the money to buy the Los Angeles Lakers. Buss pitched pro basketball to Sterling as a great investment and encouraged him to go after the professional team in San Diego, the Clippers.

In 1981, Sterling purchased the San Diego Clippers. The asking price was $12.5 million. Sterling got the team on a layaway plan, assuming almost $10 million in debt and deferred compensation.

“It’s the start of a new era!” Sterling promised in an open letter to fans, Dave Zirin wrote in his book Bad Sports: How Owners Are Ruining the Games We Love.

“I’m in San Diego to stay and committed to making the city proud of the Clippers. I’ll build the Clippers through the draft, free agency, trades, spending whatever it takes to make a winner,” Sterling said at the time.

After Sterling took over, the San Diego Clippers had a record of 72–174 and averaged fewer than 4,500 fans per game for three consecutive seasons. By 1984 the Clippers were gone; Sterling moved the team to Los Angeles.

In Los Angeles, the team posted just one winning record (‘91–92 season; 45–37) and three playoff appearances (‘91–92, ‘92–93, ‘96–97) between 1985 and 2005.

Since 2010 — superstar Blake Griffin’s rookie season — things have started to turn around for the Clippers. The team had its first-round playoff win in the 2011–12 season, and its back-to-back first place regular season division finishes in 2012–13 and 2013–14.

Still, during Sterling’s tenure — the longest in the league at 32 years — the Clippers have the worst winning percentage in the NBA, as well as the worst winning percentage in the four major American professional sports.

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Alex Gallardo/Los Angeles Times / MCT

4. Has Sterling had legal problems in the past?


In 1984, when Sterling moved the Clippers from San Diego to Los Angeles, he failed to seek the NBA’s approval for the relocation, and the league fined him $25 million.

Sterling sued the league for $100 million and withdrew the suit when the league agreed to reduce his fine to $6 million.

Apart from team business, most notably, Sterling was sued by the U.S. Department of Justice for racially discriminatory practices involving his Los Angeles rental properties. According to the lawsuit, Sterling wouldn’t rent to non-Koreans in Koreatown and wouldn’t allow any African-Americans to rent his Beverly Hills properties. According to the suit, Sterling said he did not like to rent to “Hispanics” because “Hispanics smoke, drink, and just hang around the building.” He also stated that “black tenants smell and attract vermin.”

Sterling settled with the Justice Department in 2005 for a record $2.73 million, the largest ever obtained by the government in a discrimination case involving apartment rentals.

5. What about the Elgin Baylor incident?

In February 2009, Sterling was sued by former Clippers General Manager Elgin Baylor for employment discrimination on the basis of age and race. Baylor accused Sterling of having a team vision “of a Southern plantation–type structure” in the lawsuit.

Baylor claimed the team had “egregious salary disparities” based on race. He also claimed he was told to “induce African-American players to join the Clippers, despite the Clippers’ reputation of being unwilling to fairly treat and compensate African-American players.”

Baylor said Sterling had a “pervasive and ongoing racist attitude.”

Baylor later dropped the race charges of the case and a jury ruled in favor of Sterling in March 2011.

6. Anything else?

Another notable incident occurred in 2003 when Sterling sued his mistress Alexandra Castro, whom Sterling said under oath he was paying for sex. “Every time she provided sex she got $500,” Sterling said, according to the deposition. “At the end of every week or at the end of two weeks, we would figure it out, and I would, perhaps, pay her then.”

During the case Sterling reportedly took back a $1 million dollar property Castro said he gave her as a gift. They would later reach a confidential settlement.

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AP Photo/Mark J. Terrill

Donald Sterling (right), and V. Stiviano (left), his former mistress, sit courtside at an NBA game in this photo taken Oct. 25, 2013.

7. What is the latest controversy involving Sterling?

The most recent headlines involve a recording of Donald Sterling telling his former mistress, V. Stiviano, that he disapproved of her being seen publicly with black people, and reprimanded her for posting of pictures of herself on Instagram with Magic Johnson.

The recording, first obtained by TMZ Sports, was made public Saturday.

Among the things Sterling told Stiviano, who is black and Latina, during the argument:“It bothers me a lot that you want to broadcast that you’re associating with black people. Do you have to?”

“You can sleep with [black people]. You can bring them in, you can do whatever you want. The little I ask you is not to promote it on that … and not to bring them to my games.”

“I’m just saying, in your lousy f******* Instagrams, you don’t have to have yourself with, walking with black people.”

“…Don’t put him [Magic Johnson] on an Instagram for the world to have to see so they have to call me. And don’t bring him to my games.”

After the recording surfaced, the NBA conducted a forensic investigation and interviewed Sterling. NBA Commissioner Adam Silver said a forensic expert confirmed the audio recording was of Sterling and had not been altered in any way.

8. How did the Clippers players react?

During warm-ups before the team’s first game following the allegations, Clippers players threw their team gear down at midcourt and warmed up in logo-less red shirts and pants. The Golden State Warriors went on to defeat the Clippers, 118–97.

In a post-game press conference, Coach Doc Rivers said he got 45 minutes of sleep the night before the game.

The next day, Rivers issued a lengthy statement to reiterate how “disappointed I am in the comments attributed to [Donald Sterling] and I can’t even begin to tell you how upset I am and our players are.”

Two days later, on the morning before Game 5 of the series, Rivers reportedly said that if Sterling remained the team’s owner he would not be back to coach the 2014–15 season.

After the decision by Silver was announced Tuesday, a report was released that said Golden State players were prepared to boycott Game 5 against the Clippers if the NBA did not mete out a harsh enough punishment to Sterling.

Jose Carlos Fajardo/Bay Area News Group / MCT

Jose Carlos Fajardo/Bay Area News Group / MCT


9. And what did the NBA do to punish Sterling?

NBA Commissioner Adam Silver announced Tuesday that he is banning Sterling for life and fining him $2.5 million.

During his press conference, Silver called the comments by Sterling “deeply offensive” and “hateful.”

Silver also said he will urge the league’s Board of Governors to force a sale of the Clippers. The Board of Governors consists of the team owners or the majority owner if a team has multiple owners.

For a forced sale to happen, Silver will need three-fourths of the league’s owners to support him and vote Sterling out. He said Tuesday he fully expects to get the support needed.

A date for the vote has not been set yet, but the NBA owners’ advisory and finance committee will meet Thursday to discuss next steps in the final removal of Donald Sterling.

10. What about Sterling’s First Amendment rights?

The First Amendment might be a defense from government action but not from a private entity, such as the NBA taking action.

Also, according to Article 24(i) of the NBA’s constitution, Silver as commissioner has broad authority to suspend and fine an owner for conduct detrimental to the league.

Practically speaking, “banning” Sterling is more of an indefinite suspension. He is forbidden from attending games, practices, and other league events. He also can’t have contact with players, coaches, and staff.

The $2.5 million fine might seem a paltry sum to Sterling, who is reportedly worth $1.9 billion, but it is the maximum allowed under the league.

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Chris Pedota/The Record / MCT

NBA Commissioner Adam Silver addresses the media on April 29.

11. Will Sterling have to sell the team?

Judging from the early response from other NBA organizations, it appears that Silver will likely have more than enough support to force the sale of the team.

Owners siding with Silver will decide that Sterling is guilty of “conduct prejudicial or detrimental to the Association” under Article 35A(d) of the league constitution and should be removed.

They will also argue Sterling has damaged labor relations between the players and league.

Furthermore, owners can say that while the Clippers are not currently in financial trouble, Sterling’s behavior has been detrimental to the Clippers organization. More than 10 sponsors, including Red Bull, CarMax, State Farm, and Kia, suspended or ended their relationship with the team when the news of Sterling’s comments broke.

The team Sterling bought in 1981 for $13.5 million is now estimated to to be worth between $550 and $700 million. According to several estimates, the price could go as high as $1 billion.

12. What if Sterling doesn’t want to sell?

Sterling’s best argument is an antitrust case.

“The owners gathering together and taking a collective action to oust Donald Sterling and force him to sell his position in the Clippers could be deemed a ‘group boycott’ and a restraint of trade,” attorney Darren Heitner told BuzzFeed. “Courts do not react favorably to group boycotts.”

The league’s best bet to avoid this is to carefully ensure that the sale process is as open as possible — possibly even opening it up to an auction.

It’s a good bet to assume that Silver, a lawyer himself, has thought of this argument.

13. So that’s it, Donald Sterling is going to sell the team and make a giant profit?

If the market dictates that’s what the team is worth, Sterling is going to make a lot of money.

Sports Illustrated sports law writer Michael McCann breaks down what Sterling will have to give back in capital gains when the team sells for big money:

Sterling reportedly purchased the Clippers for $12.5 million in 1981. If he sold the team today, it would be worth at least $600 million, perhaps closer to $1 billion. Between federal and state capital gains taxes, Sterling would pay an approximately 33 percent tax rate on the difference between what he paid for the team and what he sold it for. For instance, if he sold the Clippers today for $1 billion, Sterling would pay capital gain taxes of 33 percent on a gain of $987.5 million. As a result, Sterling would owe Federal & state capital gain taxes of approximately $329 million.

Via sportsillustrated.cnn.com

14. What does this mean for the NBA?

Some have argued that banning Sterling sets poor precedent for the NBA that would allow the league to kick out other owners and gives too much power to the commissioner in the process.

According to attorney Heitner, Silver and the league need to be careful that two things don’t happen:

“It is so important that Commissioner Adam Silver provides sufficient justification to cause the owners to vote for Sterling’s termination. If the vote is vacated by a court of law, it could seriously dismantle the commissioner’s powers that are believed to exist. Alternatively, if a court deems that Antitrust Law does not apply, it could lead to penultimate commissioner power and allow for more subjective decisions to be made in the future without fear of recourse.”

Ultimately, it seems important to the NBA that Sterling’s banning is not transformed into just a suspension with him back sitting courtside at some point in the future.

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Wally Skalij/Los Angeles Times / MCT

The seats of Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling sit empty before the start of play against the Golden State Warriors on April 29.

Correction: A previous version of this post misstated the year Donald and Shelly Sterling were married. It was 1955. (4/30)

Read more: http://buzzfeed.com/mikehayes/how-the-nba-will-fight-to-get-the-clippers-away-from-racist

1. When he stood on top of his yacht and giggled:

Fameflynet Pictures

2. When he spread his arms:

Fameflynet Pictures

3. When he got out of the water and was chilly:

Fameflynet Pictures

4. And then took a shower and the water bounced off his smooth tan skin:

Fameflynet Pictures

5. When he rested on the ledge because he was tired from lifting his arms and being so perfect:

Fameflynet Pictures

6. When he changed into little floral swimming trunks:

Fameflynet Pictures

7. When he stuck his index fingers out like this:

Fameflynet Pictures

8. When he prepared to dive:

Fameflynet Pictures

9. When he dove into the water with flawless form:

Fameflynet Pictures

10. When he sat on his boat and hung his legs over the ledge and wore a tiny black bathing suit:

Fameflynet Pictures

11. When he bounced this ball with his perfectly arched foot:

Fameflynet Pictures

12. When he flew in the air and his foot was still perfectly arched:

Fameflynet Pictures

13. When he flew again and his legs did this:

Fameflynet Pictures

14. And when he literally stopped time and nothing continued and he froze like this forever and it was all OK.

Fameflynet Pictures

Read more: http://buzzfeed.com/lyapalater/the-most-important-moments-of-rafael-nadals-vacation


At GuysAmericanKitchenandBar.com, they’re serving up “two jumbo Big Gulp Slurpee cups filled with nacho cheese and tied to each other with 25 bacon strips fashioned into a giant bow.” If you’re among the fans of this and other generously portioned culinary delights, tough luck — the website is a parody.

Guy Fieri, the famed Food Network personality best known for bringing down-home American food to the television masses with his show Diners, Drive-ins and Dives, owns a restaurant called Guy’s American Kitchen and Bar in New York City. Unfortunately for him, however, he doesn’t own the domain name.

Instead, GuysAmericanKitchenAndBar.com was snapped up by Bryan Mytko, an NYC-based programmer who decided to have a little fun with the eatery’s new (albeit, imaginary) menu.

From the layout and font to the rock ‘n’ roll references, Mytko’s version perfectly imitates the actual menu over at GuysAmerican.com, the official website for Guy’s American Kitchen and Bar.

But rather than serving up the restaurant’s tamer sounding appetizers and entrées — including “Sashimi Tacos” and “BBQ Buffalo Meatloaf” — Mytko’s menu features outlandish meals, some of which we’ve listed below for your reading pleasure:

  • Honky-Tonky Double Barrel Meat Loaded Blast: “A Sammy Hagar lookalike pushes your face into a leather bag filled with oil and if you eat the whole thing, you get to eat a 13 pound burger.”
  • The “Hobo Lobo Bordello Slam Jam” Appetizer: “We take a 38 oz of super-saddened, Cheez-gutted wolf meat, lambast it with honey pickle wasabi and pile drive it into an Ed Hardy-designed bucket. Sprayed with Axe and finished with a demiglaze of thick & funky Mushroom Dribblins.”
  • Panamania!: “Deep fried snake with a printed out picture of David Lee Roth stapled on it and a sparkler sticking out of each eye. Served with a side of Bud Light you have to wring out of a Hawaiian shirt.”

Mytko’s parody site recalls the awesomely bad review of American Kitchen and Bar from New York Times food critic Pete Wells. In the viral review, Wells writes almost entirely in rhetorical questions, lambasting everything about the restaurant.

Do you think Guy Fieri should try to acquire the GuysAmericanKitchenandBar.com domain name, and end the parody? Give us your take, below.

The Duchess of Cambridge wore some stunning outfits while on tour in Australia and New Zealand. Here they are ranked from most amazing to least amazing (note: still amazing).

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24. Shirt And Blazer Combo

Shirt And Blazer Combo

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Kate wore this look for wine tasting in Queenstown and it was very appropriate for wine tasting in Queenstown. That is all.

23. Dark Blue Rebecca Taylor Suit

Dark Blue Rebecca Taylor Suit

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A classic suit from a New Zealand designer, it’s just a little on the boring side.

22. Green Erdem Coat

Green Erdem Coat

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It is gorgeous but a teensy bit plain. Bonus points for having a Prince who makes sure she stays dry.

21. Blue Stella McCartney Dress

Blue Stella McCartney Dress

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Simple, elegant, and matching both husband and son. Adorable.

20. Diane von Furstenberg Dress

Diane von Furstenberg Dress

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Kate took a break from the block colours in this print dress. Yet you can’t help being distracted by the little princesses she’s greeting.

19. Cream Jumper And Jeans

Cream Jumper And Jeans

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You can’t see the whole outfit here but you CAN see Kate and Wills having fun and that’s the best part.

18. Striped Tee And Blazer Combo

Striped Tee And Blazer Combo

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This is a similar outfit to what Kate wore for wine tasting, but the striped tee makes it so much cuter – and perfect for the yacht race they took part in this day. And William, bless, still trying to keep her dry.

17. Green Catherine Walker Coat

Green Catherine Walker Coat

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Another green coat, but this one has a flare to the skirt that makes it so fun. Also she is totally checking out William’s butt here, and who can blame her, amirite?

16. Michael Kors Coat Dress And Jonathan Howard Hat

Michael Kors Coat Dress And Jonathan Howard Hat

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Emilia Wickstead

Stylish and still suitable for ANZAC Day.

15. Roksanda Ilincic Dress

Roksanda Ilincic Dress

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Beautiful cut, bland colour.

14. Emilia Wickstead Dress And Jane Taylor Hat

Emilia Wickstead Dress And Jane Taylor Hat

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Adorable and a lovely nod to New Zealand.

13. Hobbs Dress

Hobbs Dress

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A simple but striking dress to complement the stunning surroundings at Uluru.

12. Zimmerman Dress

Zimmerman Dress

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So pretty – and achievable!

11. Blue Alexander McQueen Coat

Blue Alexander McQueen Coat

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Want. This.

10. Tory Burch Dress

Tory Burch Dress

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What, you don’t wear dresses like this to play dates?

9. Luisa Spagnoli Suit

Luisa Spagnoli Suit

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Like a boss.

8. Yellow Mystery Dress

Yellow Mystery Dress

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Rumour has it Kate designed this dress herself – if you needed any more proof she has brilliant taste.

7. LK Bennett Dress

LK Bennett Dress

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This was also sported by Mindy Kaling which makes it doubly awesome.

6. Alexander McQueen Outfit

Alexander McQueen Outfit

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A vision in pink.

5. Jenny Packham Dress

Jenny Packham Dress

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Simple but dazzling.

4. Alexander McQueen Coat And Jane Taylor Hat

Alexander McQueen Coat And Jane Taylor Hat

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3. Yellow Roksanda Ilincic Dress

Yellow Roksanda Ilincic Dress

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Kate went bold in Australian “gold” for her arrival in Sydney, and it was amazing.

2. Catherine Walker Coat And Gina Foster Hat

Catherine Walker Coat And Gina Foster Hat

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THAT HAT. Plus that coat. So cute.

1. Lela Rose Dress

Lela Rose Dress

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Correction: An earlier version of this post incorrectly described Kate’s Michael Kors outfit as Emilia Wickstead.

Read more: http://buzzfeed.com/jennaguillaume/the-definitive-ranking-of-kates-royal-tour-outfits